I dreamt that I went to granny’s house. it was fenced off and a guy was inside. He let me enter and it was a hodge podge of old and new furniture, fixtures. Flooring.

Tears filled my eyes. The man stared. Over the lump in my throat I told him I hadn’t been inside the house for over 30 years. I asked if I could walk through it. He said yes.

I walked through the dining room where Jason’s crib sat and toward the back of the house to the yard. There was a large wooden bar to the right. I asked the man where this was. He pointed. It sat in the corner there, on the right.

I stood at the back screen door and wept. I looked out, almost opened the door buy the view was so foreign. I could see the neighbors black lab, the Infiniti or negative edge pool they build but granny’s yard was a muddy patch of waterlogged grass along a brick retaining wall. I didn’t recognize it. The fruit tree (was it apple) from which she’d pull a switch was either gone, pruned or so much larger that I didn’t recognize it either.

I walked back toward the dining area and a woman w wild red hair was standing there. I looked in her face.

You look do familiar.

She looked back, smiled.

I felt the tears well up. She saw them too.

I said is your name Lynn? Or stephanie? Did u teach at shaver?

She leaned back. Expression changed. Sense of recognition, maybe fear or doubt of who I was and why i I knew this about her.

 Yes, yes it is.

Then I woke up.