For many years my family would have a huge flocked tree with beautifully wrapped gifts spilling out from under it. Lit up by our old chipped color wheel. The house was trimmed in red, blue and green lights, and the monstrous fir tree in the front yard was bedazzled as well.

As we got older we chose names so there really should have been one gift for each person 10 gifts total but still, the tree was held up by mounds of boxes. And when my nephew arrived we really shined it on.

Then my parents divorced.

Christmas was gone. No more color wheel, no more lights, no mounds of gifts, no turkey and dressing. No house trimmed in lights, no laughter, no peace.

Funny how a single act can change a holiday.

I successfully avoided the commercialism of Christmas this year.  No running through the mall trying to find gifts for people that I don’t really want to give a gift to.  No mailing of cards or putting cash in the mail. For me this was a season of being.  I will create my own Christmas traditions, things that will not be dependent on the participation of others.